From ROAD TO REBECCA ... to.... ROAD TO RECOVERY

From #ROADTOREBECCA to …….

PS It's going to be a long post so grab some coffee

please beware semi graphic picture 

When I wrote my last blog post in August about our once in a life time experience at Rebecca farms, I thought that would most likely be the last one. I thought to myself, "what could we possibly do next that could be even remotely close to that experience". Charlotte and I took a few months off from competing, we went to one small schooling show before our winter break and received one of our best dressage scores (my first time sitting the entire test) along with a super fun jump round. I kicked our intense training routine down a notch and decided we would just have fun and work on our dressage boot camp tactics for the winter months, we settled into a new, comfortable routine. 

About three weeks ago, on Saturday November 10th I went to grab Charlotte from the field for our group lesson and noticed her left eye larger than the right. We had just started doing group lessons with two really fun ladies! As I brought her in, I noticed that she did not appear to be in pain, was not squinting, and it just didn't seem to bother her. Charlotte loves to roll and lay out in her pasture and there was some dirt on that side of her face so I figured she may just have some in her eye. I continued to tack her up, she was rearing to go, and we did our group jump lesson with out a hitch in her step. 

Fast forward a few days: I went out to ride Charlotte for our normal dressage day and noticed her eye was not worse but it also did not appear to have gotten any smaller. I knew our outstanding veterinarian was on her way to administer vaccinations and I sent her a text to take a look at the eye just in case. We started her on a steroid cream for the next few days. We continued as normal, Charlotte's friend Sarah came out to ride, Jenny (our trainer) rode her on Thursday and then Friday rolled around …. Our veterinarian Heather was out to do dental work on a few horses and took a look at Charlottes eye again, because as much as it didn't get any worse it sure didn't look any smaller or any different than day one. 

Heather was amazing, she took multiple pressure readings and an ultrasound of her eye. Everything came back normal. We decided to switch to antibiotics and an antibiotic eye cream in case there was an infection or bacteria behind the eye. Heather suggested an outstanding ophthalmologist to check her eye as well. Dr Sullivan was available the following evening and did an ultrasound of his own along with a lot of probing around. He was able to asperate tissue from multiple locations behind her eye. Charlotte was a trooper through the entire endeavor, and we had part of our barn family that stayed up with us into the very cold winter night. I stayed with Charlotte after everyone left to make sure she woke up from the sedation ok and wrap her in her blanket for the night. We continued her on the antibiotics and some bute for pain relief precautionary. 

The next morning Her eye started to get worse … 

 It seemed that something in her eye was starting to drain, but the swelling was getting a bit worse as well. The draining we hoped was a good thing. We thought that meant she may have an abscess or a cyst or even a clogged tear duct. Unfortunately that was not the case. Her eye continued to get even worse. The tissue was being pushed on for too long and was starting to push its way up. Like when people flip there eye lid as a joke to gross people out. The results from the tissue samples came back with high white blood cells but did not tell us what might be causing her eye to bulge. 

Next step was to try some x-rays. 3 days after the 2nd ultra sound with the Ophthalmologist, we did a third ultra sound and multiple xrays of her eye. We were looking for any bone damage or reconstruction that a tumor may have caused to give us a better idea of what might have been behind her eye. We also took a look at her teeth incase there was an infected tooth or abscess close to that side. The xrays were inconclusive, and the third ultra sound showed a small pocket of something behind her eye but again it was inconclusive as to what might be there. We did blood work to get a baseline of her vitals, along with a report of any possible hint toward her mystery eye problem. 

Tuesday November 20th, after the x-rays, third ultra sound and a dental check we started her on some intense antibiotic to hopefully kill and fight any pesky infection that might be lingering. We also noticed an ulcer starting in her eye due to not being able to close her eye all the way from the swelling and tissue. Through the Thanksgiving weekend she was being give in a number of medications 3 times a day to try to help her body fight off what ever was behind the eye. We also wanted to keep her as comfortable as possible. I have to say through this entire time she never once acted any different. She was her normal playful self, running in the pasture and rolling around. I still have not ridden since that last lesson and I know she is excited to go back to work, however I did not want to jeopardize any progress we may have made.

The new antibiotics and other meds seem to help quiet a bit. They got us through the Thanksgiving weekend and I started to see improvement. Her eye was looking 10x better however the size never changed. I was happy to receive multiple text messages from everyone at the barn stating how much better it looked. I am forever grateful for the barn family and supports that went out of there way to check on Charlotte. I know everyone was worried. But I knew the truth, and deep down I knew something just wasn't right. The eye looked more aesthetically pleasing but it was still bulging from her head. 

On November 26th, Monday, Heather made her way out to see Charlotte and come up with a new plan. She suggested taking her to Washington state university veterinary teaching hospital in Pullman, WA. There we would be able to place her head into the CT scan in hopes of a better idea as to what was behind her eye causing it to bulge. Dr. Heather Fraser went above and beyond consulting with different veterinarians in the area trying to solve this mystery. She called WSU and spoke with Dr. Gold about possible ideas and treatments for Charlotte. After talking me through that she has done everything in her power to treat Charlotte, but the best thing would be the CT scan. 

( These are pictures of her eye before we left for WSU )

I want what is best for Charlotte, our only dilemma was traveling to WSU. First off I do not have a trailer and the one we always catch a ride in, is owned by our trainer whom is on vacation. She graciously allowed me to drive it over the pass on our 6 hour adventure. I had never driven the trailer by myself...… and I could not find anyone available to come with. I didn't want anyone taking time off of work to come along, but I also was nervous about driving. Well since my fiancé had work, I decided instead of finding someone to watch our dogs or come with me, I would take them on the road trip. Armed with snacks, a few credit cards (LOL) and my two greatest companions we hit the road early Thursday (nov.29th) morning. 

(along with my amazing coworkers that covered for me while I was gone)

I mapped out my route including rest stops and where to fill up on gas and synced my phone to the truck for hands free. I was mostly nervous about the pass and how to maneuver through the gas station haha but I know ….. go slow and turn wide ! We made it through town and onto I90 The road was clear and beautiful. No snow and not too many cars on the road. a few hours in I decided to stop for a bathroom break, found an easy rest stop to pull into and took a quick break. Let the dogs walk around, checked on Charlotte and ate a snack. Leaving I knew we had enough gas to get to the gas station and headed on out. I decided we would go the long way around and stay on I90 as long as we could, got gas in George and continued along. 

Shortly after our last stop the map told me to head south on hwy21 toward Lind and eventually onto hwy26. Since I synced my phone for hands free, I was unable to move the map around and just continued on my way. Little did I know that driving over the pass and through the gas station would be the least of my worries. As we followed the narrow road of hwy21 through the farm land I did not see a single car for over an hour. Heading into the next town, which was Colfax I was happy to see other cars and people around. The map took me through a residential neighbor and down the steep hill. The hill abruptly stopped and turned sharp onto the next residential street. White knuckled gripping the steering wheel, the hill reminded me of  Seattle, I was hitting the break but not slowing down much. After the turn we had another turn in the opposite direction, that was more of a hairpin turn than the first! Slowly maneuvering my way through I made it without hesitation (I definitely started sweating profusely). As the road got larger and we came around the last turn into Pullman I started noticing cars parked along the street. The road then started to narrow and I noticed we had made it to campus. Unfortunately we were now driving through campus. Me and the giant 4 horse goose neck were then maneuvering through WSU campus. I was so happy to see the signs pointing us to the veterinary hospital and finally was able to park the rig. 

We were shortly met by one of the most outgoing students. I unloaded Charlotte and walked her to her stall for the weekend. As we settled in, the WSU student (I will not add her name to the blog with out her consent) asked multiple question about Charlotte's daily routine and how they can keep her happy and comfortable during her stay. She then asked about the history of her eye, when the swelling started and everything leading up to our drive over. As you can tell, it was quiet the story along with the names of all the medications we tried. As she listened intently we were then met by Dr. Gold. I spoke on the phone with Dr. Gold before I left Monroe, and she was just as sweet and kind in person. Dr. Gold gathered her students and preformed an ultra sound and drew blood for labs. As she talked with her students about the discrepancies between the two eyes I started to learn a few things and also noticed the "thing" located behind the eye. 

Side note : I did not have any practice backing the trailer up, so a very nice veterinary resident backed the rig up for me. Especially because it was very dark by the time we were finishing up. Don't worry, I will be practicing that maneuver as well. haha

After tucking Charlotte into bed and scheduling a time for the CT scan in the morning, I made my way to the Airbnb I booked. This was an experience on its own, especially since it was my first time staying at an Airbnb by myself. The house was located just outside of main street in Moscow, ID and they thankfully allowed myself and my two large dogs to book one of the rooms on the upper floor of their home. After checking in and learning the lay of the land, I had an adult beverage after my stressful haul through campus and went to bed …. at 7pm!!! I also realized that I had been so stressed out I had not eaten anything except a few handfuls of popcorn on the drive over. 

The next morning I met with Dr. Gold and her student to discuss treatment for Charlotte. She was bright eyed and bushy tailed that morning ready for her debut in the CT scan. It was incredible to witness such a large animal laying on its back with her head in the scan. The technology we have now a days is amazing. She was sedated for the entire event and then slowly woken back up afterwards while we waited for the results. Everyone stopped by to tell me what a love she is and how beautiful. She was hand walked and politely received scratches from everyone.

The CT scan showed a large mass behind her eye. The dilemma I was in had to do with her possibly "healthy" eye. Dr. Gold was great, giving me multiple option on how to approach the situation. Since the scan shows a large mass that was contained to the globe of the eye, it unfortunately did not tell us exactly what the mass was. Her blood work showed high globulin levels, which could indicate that the mass was a potential tumor. SO that brings us to the decisions making ……… 1. take a potentially healthy eye to find out that the mass was just an abscess??? 2. Leave it in and go home in hopes it is an abscess but find out that it was a tumor and now Charlotte is at a higher risk???? 3. Take out the eye just in case it is a tumor???? ….. I decided to go through with enucleation surgery and have them remove the eye and send in the mass for testing. 

About an hour later I received the phone call that the surgery went well, Charlotte was recovering very nicely and that I made the right call. The mass was a tumor and now we just need to find out what kind. Unfortunately the tumor was quiet large and they were unable to get all of it out, cross your fingers its benign. But I trust that the surgeon did everything in is power. The surgeon ended up being the awesome person that backed up the rig for me. He answered all of my questions and made sure Charlotte was very comfortable after surgery.

Next came the waiting game …. I was originally scheduled to leave that next morning (Saturday) but they wanted to continue to monitor Charlotte's progress. This was kind of a blessing in disguise because it started to snow in Pullman and over the pass … a lot. After I gave Charlotte a cookie and checked on her after surgery I found myself walking through the town of Moscow, ID with my two amazing dogs. As I tried to find a dog friendly place to eat I noticed the road was closed off for traffic. We approached a man under a white tent next to free hot chocolate and asked why? … Turns out it was Mayor Bill, the mayor of Moscow! And they were having a Christmas parade which included Santa arriving via helicopter!! I rushed the dogs back to the Airbnb to feed them dinner and change into warmer clothes and we walked back into town. I ordered food to go and we sat on the front deck of the restaurant and watched the parade.

 Shortly after we started to watch the parade our old friend Nicolette invited us to her barn party! We packed up and drove the short distance to her stables and met all of her wonderful students. Some of which know Charlotte via Instagram fame and the others are students at WSU and met Charlotte at the hospital. After we all talked about Charlottes surgery and our time in Pullman, I had the pleasure of participating in the late night bareback ride. Nicolette graciously allowed me to ride her sweet pony Princess, and yes she lived up to her name. I talked with Nicolette about trying to find a place to stay since I only booked my Airbnb through Friday night and she was over the moon with having me stay at her home Saturday night...… I only had to find something to do the last day while Charlotte recovered.

Saturday morning I woke up early to pack my stuff and feed my doggies, followed by my meeting with Charlotte's care givers. That morning I realized my older dog Cooper was not eating any of his breakfast. I sat down and hand fed him one kibble at a time until he would not eat anymore. Cooper and I have a similar if not stronger connection than the bond I share with Charlotte and I think he was feeding off my stress and it was starting to effect him.

Our drive to visit Charlotte was short, we met up with our favorite WSU student whom kept me updated all night about her progress and then updated me again that morning about all her vitals and how she was coping with only one eye. She had a slight elevated temperature over night and her heart rate was a bit fast indicated she may have been in a little bit of pain so they administered some pain management and her temperature went back down to normal. That morning she seemed a bit more quiet than her usual self, so I spent a long time scratching her in all of her itchy spots. I decide to give her some time to relax and they said I could come back to visit later that afternoon.

(Charlotte enjoying her scratches)

One of the amazing resident veterinarians recommended a fun low key hike that I could take my dogs to that morning. The roads were still pretty icy from the snow before and it continued to snow into mid morning. Cooper, Mac and I made it up to Kamiak Butte to over look Palouse, WA. The view that early in the morning with all the snow was just stunning! And the dogs had a blast. I think they both needed to get out and play as much as I needed the time away from worrying about Charlotte and whether I made the right decision or not. 

Of course I forgot my hiking boots but I still had my nike tennis shoes which worked out really well on the trek up the trail. We had so much time on our hands, we moseyed on up the trail stopping to take fun pictures and enjoy the scenery. Soon we found the very top of the trail with the picnic area and a sign that indicated : continue down trail 3 miles to parking lot level: difficult. I figured since we had plenty of time, that the "difficult" trail would not be too bad. Little did I know that it was pretty skinny and steep at times. My nike's did a great job at keeping my feet dry, especially since it was dry snow, however it was not an easy trek down the mountain. I slid down more than 50% of it and few slides resulted in falling on my back side into the snow. 

We finally made it down to the parking lot and settled in for a snack while we watched the snow fall. Meanwhile I was intently watching the weather reports for our potential drive home the next morning. After rearranging the truck and driving back into town, the pups and I went on a mission to get dog food and anything else we might need for our evening and drive home. You see Mac has food allergies and I had only packed enough dog food until Saturday so we were on a mission to find a local pet store that carried his (or close to) dog food. We found a fun little shop called "pets are people too" then off to the local market for some fresh soup and snacks. I realized I again had skipped all meals during my stressful evening and morning awaiting updates on Charlotte. 

The pups and I made our way to the lovely home of Nicolette and Jared to clean up and get ready for our last visit with Charlotte before our long drive the next day. I snuck in an apple for Charlotte to munch on and she was acting like her old self. She was ready to leave! She seemed to be adapting well with her new loss of vision on the left side. Besides the accidental bonk on the head to our favorite WSU student she seemed to be getting around her stall very well. I tucked her in one last time and promised her we would leave in the morning and headed back to the house for some much needed rest. 

Unfortunately, Cooper my older dog would not eat at all that day and really started to scare me. I was worried we were going to have to stay another few days with him in the hospital this time. He seemed to perk up that next morning when I told him we were going home and we packed the truck up for the last time in Pullman. 

Back at WSU Veterinary teaching school, Dr. Heaton the surgeon stopped by (I believe on his day off) to show me how to bandage Charlotte's incision site. He was very helpful and answered any last minute questions I had and even made sure I was ok to hook up the truck and trailer. (since he was the one to back it in for me haha) With everything packed and hooked up we slowly loaded Charlotte into the trailer. She bumped the left side just a bit but was happy to be headed home. 

Our drive started out better … with some help from new friends I found a better route out of town instead of through campus and around Colfax instead of through the neighborhood. The biggest challenge was the white fog from the cold snowy morning. It was trying really hard to snow, small snowflakes were falling on the windshield and I could only see about 5 ft in front of me while I drove. Slowly but surely we made it out to hwy 26 and instead of going around this time, we went straight through. It was a bit scary in Cle Elum with it actively snowing and lots of slush on the ground with the side of the road covered. Charlotte was moving around quiet a bit, which made the trailer slide a few times. I believe she was feeling her pain meds a bit more than I anticipated. But we made it to our first stop for gas and then up and over the pass. Slow and steady we were finally home. 

When we arrived at the barn, I was so relived to get out of the truck I parked in the middle of everything haha! Letting the dogs out and opening up Charlotte's window so she could see that we made it. As I opened the back door tot he trailer, talking to her so she knew I was approaching on her non vision side, I started to un tie her. As we slowly backed out of the trailer Charlotte started to panic just a bit. Her poor legs were trembling and she was trying to turn around and see behind her. Normally she nicely walks backwards out of the trailer with no problems. I don't know exactly how she was feeling but, I could tell she was scared and possibly having some depth perception issues backing out of the trailer. She flung herself forward a few time before I had her just stop moving. Calmly and slowly, while talking to her I eased her one small step at a time backwards. Once she had one foot on the ground I half expected her to fling herself backwards but she calmly waited for me to step out of the trailer next. 

Walking her to her stall she was greeted by all of her friends, she was excited to see them and eat her dinner. I made the mistake by not swinging wide enough and she clipped her hip on the wall into her stall but between the two of us we will get the hang of it. Time will only tell what she wants to do next. Charlotte is ready to get back to work, that much I can tell. Whether we jump or not and how soon we will compete again is up to her and the progress she makes, one hoof at a time. We are still waiting on results of the tumor that was found behind her eye, but for now we will take one day at a time slowly healing and adapting to her new life style. She has already proven to defy the odds and I am excited to see what the next challenge/goal is for her. 

This trip was a lot of firsts for me and a real adventure, but I also learned a lot about what myself and what I am capable of. It is crazy to think that this time last year we were #roadtorebecca bound ... the journey of becoming the first full Clydesdale to compete in the 3-day long format in Montana at the beautiful Rebecca farms. Now we are #roadtorecovery and who knows?, You may see us at Rebecca once again, this time even more special. #underdog

Updated 12/6 : Thanks to the wonderful horse community, multiple people have reached out that want to donate toward Charlotte's recovery and help out in anyway they can. Please don't hesitate to contact me if you have any questions. 

If you would like to donate, I set up a paypal account for her 

www.paypal.me/eventingclydesdale 

or Venmo @cortney-mcdaniel